Dark Days

Over half-way through spring, and the end of the school year is in sight - happy days, right? No, in fact, the end of the school year brings some difficult times (cue dramatic music)... state-mandated testing. Not only has it become the focus for the teachers, as they now have to teach to curricula aimed at the tests without allowance for variation in teaching styles or methods; there is such frequent mention to the kids about the importance of testing that it raises the stress ante out of proportion. How sad. It becomes especially difficult for the kiddos who struggle to maintain their academic level, and missing class time due to testing creates problems with finishing current assignments, so grades drop due to late assignments.

A word to the wise:  stay in contact with the teachers and counselors. Girlie is really sad about taking such a dramatic hit to her math grade after struggling all year to stay at grade level, and this is the first time she has really indicated caring about grades at all.

The recent eclipse brought some concern; at least, all the discussion about it did. Imagine hearing phrases such as, "ring of fire" and "moon obscuring the sun" if you are the kind of person who doesn't realize that questions can be asked of others when one is anxious. As it turned out, we saw very little evidence that it happened at all, since it was so rainy and overcast here.

Something with great potential has happened, but it's too soon to get my hopes up: since Girlie has shown some interest in cooking and food preparation, she has become willing to dish up her own dinner and agrees to have at least a few bites of what is prepared (without argument, because she is serving herself!) before fixing her own alternative meal. This could mean I can make anything for dinner, without regard to the potential for tantrums, and not have to prepare a completely separate meal for Girlie. In my wildest fantasies I can imagine never again witnessing a screaming, fist-pounding, hair-pulling, face-hitting meltdown at the dinner table. It's only been a week since the last one, though, so the visual is still pretty vivid. 

It's well documented that folks with chronic health issues, especially inflammatory and/or auto-immune conditions, are prone to occasional difficulties with depression, which can lead to a withdrawal from social activities and involvement. These problems can be exacerbated by stress, but that's all I'm going to say about that.

A final note: I think we're past the worst of the pollen that has been so tough on Girlie this year. We live in a pretty heavily-treed area so I don't know if it is the fir or the maple that affects her the most, and I think they run about the same time frame. Here is what two days of accumulation looks like on the car - no wonder Girlie could hardly breathe through the congestion! Bad timing, considering the testing at school, since she finds it much more difficult to sleep and concentrate, but I think we're over the hump in a lot of ways at our house.

Must be the Full Moon...

We've all heard references to the moon affecting many things.  When I worked in a hospital, staff always talked about more emergency room visits around the full moon.  Teachers talk about kids being more excitable and distracted during the full-moon phase.  There is controversy about whether these theories can be proven, but when one witnesses enough anecdotal data, it's hard to deny.

Did I consider the moon as a possible explanation for the behavior of the past several days? NO! In fact, it just now occurred to me to do some research on whether families and caregivers of children on the spectrum notice any correlation between the moon phase and meltdowns. Guess what I found out? There are abundant  references to an increase in meltdown or tantrum behavior coinciding with the lunar cycle.

Now the bigger question: what can be done about it?  Plenty, if we are aware of a trend. The majority of agitation and tantrums could have been eliminated the past few days if we had just put two and two together.  There has been a particularly large homework load due to having to catch up from a week of weather-related school closure.  Dearest and I were thinking only in terms of everyone having to do all that work, and just trying to get Girlie through it as best we could.  If we had given any thought to the extra work coinciding with a full moon, and therefore the increased likelihood of meltdowns, we would have been a lot more likely to adjust the amount of homework and the time we expected her to spend on it.  (Because Girlie is so high functioning, we try to avoid making too many adjustments to her homework and only do it when we feel it's really necessary; she has a tendency to take advantage if she thinks she can get away with it.)

Next month, we'll be paying attention.  I'll avoid making any schedule changes or planning activities that might cause too much excitement or anxiety at an otherwise vulnerable time.  We'll be careful to note the homework requirements and make adjustments more readily.

February 6, 2012 - waxing gibbous, approx. 98%

I took this photo with the aid of Dearest's telescope.  I have always loved the moon, and the first time I saw this view with my own eyes I was nearly overcome.  Conversely, Girlie has never wanted to look through the telescope, and is unable to articulate why.  That may remain a mystery, but in the meantime, I'll be sure to watch Girlie more closely when it's time for the next full moon.