Time flies!

Goodness, how did a month go by already?

Since my last post I have logged ten knitting/crochet projects totaling 1,640 yards of yarn (nearly a mile!), and made more progress on my sweater (which often gets set aside to complete something with a little quicker gratification).  There have also been a few projects started that weren't going to work out right so they were undone.  I don't consider that a waste of time, though - there is always something I can learn about using different yarn or needles, or whether it's really the kind of knitting I wanted to do.  Sometimes I'm so captivated by a knitted item I decide I must do it, without taking into consideration that it incorporates a style or method I really don't care for.  Here is one that I couldn't resist, even if it does get a bit fiddly: a Norwegian baby hat that I knitted for a new great niece.  DW has been a great model for some of my projects and she always shows things off to great advantage :-)

Norwegian Sweet Baby Cap

Both kids are doing all right, alternating between sailing along and struggling in rough seas depending on the day or issue.  Girlie will get to ride in the equine therapy program through December (which she loves) until they quit for the winter.  Boyo is busy with preparations for The Nutcracker and looking forward to starting basketball.  This will be the first time he has been involved in an organized school sport and we hope for the best.

My mother's live-in caregiver left unexpectedly so there was a bit of a flurry trying to decide how best to handle it, and several meetings and long emails/phone conversations with siblings.  At this point I think I'll call it 'so far, so good', and leave it at that.

We are preparing for an IEP meeting next week with Girlie's team and I'm sure a lot of the focus will be on how best to work on transitioning her toward high school (eep!) next fall.  That, and the holidays fast approaching with extra rehearsals, tech week, gift and charity knitting, and starting basketball practices is quite enough to be going with for the moment!  We'll concentrate on the good parts because, after all, time flies whether we're having fun or not!

Little Reminders

Sometimes, life takes us in so many different directions that I end up not being in the right place to catch one of the endless balls in the air. Keeping a calendar helps, and sending myself text and email reminders has been a great technological advantage. Appointments, rehearsals, meetings, classes, work assignments - there are very few days when at least one of us doesn't have to be somewhere, or have a deadline to meet.

Pie safe, with a new lease on life!

There are other reminders that serve to keep us on our path, and help us remember what's important. Dearest recently 'rescued' the pie safe that I grew up with; cleaning, refurbishing, and tightening all the joints after it spent several years gathering dust and falling to pieces in my mother's garage. It's a piece of furniture that has always given me comfort, because it was there when I was too young to know about the very hard things in life. It came out of an old house when Dad was working in demolition, before I was born, and he just couldn't bear to toss it aside. Hard to believe that glass has survived all the roughhousing when us kids were growing up! My brother took it when my parents moved, and stripped the old black stain to reveal the warm oak color. He gave it to me when my big kids were little, and I felt as though I was welcoming an old friend.

Lately, with Carey and her family moving, there has been a flood of reminders wrapped up in the house next door. The house where Dearest and I decided we'd have children, first through fostering, and then adoption. Where Girlie came to us only weeks after we'd made the decision. Where we said 'hello' to a brand-new-born babe that we thought was going to be our own, and then - with only two hours notice - 'good-bye' six weeks later (I choose to believe his story has a happy ending, because with confidentiality laws I will never know for sure). Where Tall Boy and Carey finally came to live with us full time, then Boyo came - and through one thing and another we ended up with two more for a total of six children in that little house (four of them teenagers), for eight months! The pie safe was there then, but had to be moved a few years later due to a severe case of us bustin' out at the seams in that house. Considering there was one person in particular, not to mention any names (coughBoyocough), who literally climbed the walls, and a couple little people who threw things during meltdowns, the pie safe was no longer safe in my care in such a little house.

No matter how many times I thank him, Dearest can't completely know the importance of this gift. Just a piece of furniture? No. In fact, although the photo shows it empty, it never was. The pie safe has always been full of reminders of comfort, safety, and the assurance that we can endure. ♥

Take a breath!

I kept thinking time was getting away from me, and mentally counting up the days since the last post - hard to believe I let three weeks go by!

So - we've been busy with horseback riding, extra rehearsals, performance at the fair, fundraising for the ballet academy's fall production, preparations for school, repairs (and some more repairs) to my van, a couple of home projects, a day trip north to visit family, checking on Mom more often while her caregiver was out of town, helping my oldest daughter and her family move out of the house next door :-(

Yes, the last item on the list was hard - still is - and has been an interesting thing to experience on many levels. I tried to ignore that it was happening right up 'til the first night they didn't sleep in their beds next door, just because there was no way I could get myself emotionally ready for it to be real.  It took the kids even longer; Girlie mentioned a couple times that she was waiting to give something to her niece and I had to remind her they really didn't live there any more. It's been most of the three weeks now, and I'm less often thinking along the lines of running next door to chat, and getting used to not hearing the squeak of the gate and fast little footsteps on my porch.

Milo 7 months - 6/12

It's a good thing - shouldn't that make it easy? No; in fact, I just realized the three weeks of not writing here was a way to delay the very last reality of it, which is putting it down in black and white. And I may have just stepped away from the computer for a bit to grab a tissue. Of course we still talk every day in some manner, but I don't have access to an immediate fix of hugs from the grandkids. And no more giggles and squeals from the yard.

All right, enough of the maudlin, let's move on to the practical. When Girlie's schedule came in the mail I noticed immediately that she'd been assigned a locker. In considering for a while it seemed like a plausible way to work on a new life skill in preparation for starting high school (!) next year. I had Girlie sit down at the table to practice with a combination lock and found she could only open it on the first try about 50% of the time. I don't even want to know how that would translate in a hallway full of kids with a time limit, so no locker for Girlie. It wasn't a problem; the school counselor had assigned it by mistake and Girlie can continue to keep her things in a cubby in the life skills classroom. The problem with the combination lock is due to her dyspraxia, which is a huge variable at any time. Girlie can sit in her room and do some beadwork in a quiet, relaxed environment, but when she is stressed or in a hurry she still has difficulty manipulating buttons on her clothes. If she must have a locker at any point, it will have to be with a keyed lock.

School got off to a great start; now it's time to get all we can out of the last sun-shiny weekend of summer with one more road trip before the real extra quiet time starts for me next week. Well, it will provide the perfect opportunity to learn how to use the knitting machine a friend gave me last week...

Let the Games Begin!

Well, really, the games are nearly over, and that's partly why I haven't written lately. This is the first year the kids have shown any interest in The Olympic Games so we've been watching for a while every evening, and the kids are watching some events in the morning, as well. Girlie has been interested in equestrian events - big surprise, huh? No; in fact, she is about all things 'horse' and has been enjoying riding again lately in the HeartStrides Therapeutic Riding and Horsemanship program at Healing Hearts Ranch. We discovered in the two years since we'd been there that the ranch owner has become a Centered Riding instructor - a method that was developed by Sally Swift who happens to have been one of Dearest's relatives! I'd like to think she'd be pleased to know that she has reached out to help us, in another of those little ways in which we are all connected.

School starts in three weeks, but it hardly feels we've had time off because Boyo chose to continue with ballet and music lessons through the summer. Next week at The Southwest Washington Fair there will be a sneak peek of some of the dances being prepared for the October production of "The Sorcerer's Apprentice". Boyo spent last weekend working hard with the Wenatchee Youth Circus when they came to the Thousand Trails Campground in Chehalis. The kids do a lot of the set up - pounding stakes, raising awnings and apparatus - then he joined them as part of a performance!

With all the busy-ness going on, my knitting has taken a back seat, and I miss it! Ravelry puts on some fun events around the theme of the Olympic games (formerly known as Ravelympics; now known as The Ravellenic Games), wherein one is part of a virtual team and joins in with a knitting project named tongue-in-cheek for an Olympic event. Although I did earn a couple of 'medals' in the 2010 games, I'm not sure if I'll accomplish as much this year.  Oh, well - at least I finished my first pair of gloves a couple weeks ago.  So: on my mark, get set, keep going!  :-)

For what it's worth...

I'm not the only person in my family who actually got choked up when I reported that Girlie came downstairs, after getting ready to go to youth group, with her hair completely brushed and dried and a very modest amount of carefully applied makeup on. Makeup! Including a tiny bit of mascara! She looked like any other 14-year-old girl-next-door. Who would have thought I'd ever place so much importance on wearing makeup? Naturally it isn't the makeup I care about, per se, it's the typicality of the situation that caught me by surprise. Girlie is growing up, and she has come a long way, Baby!  :-)

A beautiful smile can reveal interesting things in an x-ray. Boyo is going full speed ahead in orthodontia - the consult was today and braces will be on in one week! There were some aspects I could identify as problematic even without explanation from the orthodontist, so I'm glad we're not losing any time. Yes, he's anxious, and so am I (about how he'll deal with it, not about the orthodontia), but trying not to let on. Of course Girlie has been in one phase or another of her extensive orthodontia for nearly five years, so I hope that will help lessen the anxiety a bit for Boyo, in addition to knowing that his case will take about a third the length of time.

My mom is going to celebrate her 80th birthday this month. I didn't think that would be possible.

My Tall Boy is going to have a birthday this month.  I didn't think that would be possible - twice.

Dearest is going to have a birthday this month.  I've helped him celebrate eighteen of them - there have been times I wished we'd met earlier in our lives, but we would have been different people with different contributions; who can say whether we would have fallen in love?

Worth is subjective, but these things fit very nicely with the way I've been feeling lately.  Is it possible I've gone overboard about makeup, braces, and a few birthdays?  No. In fact, I think pretty much everything is holy now.

Wait... What Break?

Wow, last week was busy! Work meetings, music lessons, marching practice, ballet rehearsals, parade, recital... and a bunny?  Yes - Girlie and I fell in love with this fellow at the parade and he had to come home with us. He is a four-month-old Lionhead mix crossed with a Flemish Giant, so is likely to end up somewhere between medium and large (I think he has 'medium' covered already).

Calm and comfortable bunny!

Basking in our moment of sunshine

I named him Albus as he instantly reminded me of Dumbledore as portrayed by Richard Harris.

Boyo did a great job marching in his first parade and the ballet recital was excellent; the ballet academy has grown and accomplished so much in three years! Rehearsals for the fall production start next week, as do the tumbling classes, and Boyo informed me today he wants to continue his piano and trumpet lessons through the summer.

Girlie was excited to find out today that she will get to do some horseback riding again this summer! It's been a while, but the ranch has added a new intermediate program that sounds perfect for her. Therapeutic riding has amazing effects on people with cognitive, physical, or neurological challenges - so much so that some insurance companies are finally starting to recognize the value of hippotherapy!

Too busy to knit? No - in fact I have several projects going (of course) and am currently knitting my first pair of gloves (along with a test knit for a designer friend, a pair of stranded mittens, Boyo's socks...). This is a custom kettle-dyed black tonal merino/cashmere/nylon sock yarn that I over-dyed to have the red and blue flecking. I'm really happy with how the project is looking!

'Most Basic Gloves' pattern by Nicole Elizabeth

Yes, we're busy, and sometimes it feels like a bit more activity than I'd prefer, but I'm savoring the moments while these kiddos are happy. What more could a parent ask for?  :-)

Ready.... BREAK!

The second week of June is typically pretty busy around here, as it is the last week of school and the week before recital. Might sound "same ol', same ol'", but no - in fact, this week we have more going on than we do in some entire months of the rest of the year!

Boyo has marching band practice every day, leading up to the local annual parade Saturday morning, and extra rehearsals and class photos for the ballet recital Saturday afternoon. Since the parade happens in the morning he will miss the dress rehearsal in the performance venue, but hopefully get oriented to the stage when we take him in a few minutes early for 'call'.

There are field trips this week, my regular monthly meetings with agendas beforehand and meeting minutes after; and a new, exciting project that I'm working on for a friend's non-profit organization. Girlie has a terrible cold, and some of us are struggling against terrible attitudes - and I'll admit I'm the first person I need to take strongly in hand, here!

Blogging will be taking a back seat for a while - likely at the very back of the bus - but I'd like to leave you with something.  A dear friend (thank you, Ione!) posted a link to an amazing video, which I'll share:

...and here is another that mentioned the same wondrous premise forty years ago.

We ARE all connected. So can I borrow some of your energy to get us through the next week? ;-)

You Just Never Know!

It never fails; about the time I think nothing changes, something changes.

Girlie is starting to get interested in food preparation and cooking. I've wanted this to happen for a long time, albeit with a few reservations due to our propensity for dyspraxia-related mishaps. Still, there is no shortage of cleaning supplies in this house!

Last week while I was gone Girlie asked Dearest to help her make noodles (meaning, 'boil some pasta'), and the household was buzzing with excitement when I came home. Most recently, she turned down a chance to go swimming and asked if she could make brownies. That was much more involved because, not only was there a list of ingredients, Girlie had to figure out how to halve them because we only wanted a small pan rather than the huge quantity the recipe makes. She even managed to get the brownies out of the oven safely. How better to celebrate such a huge accomplishment than with warm brownies and milk?

Just as a reminder that Mother Nature makes her own rules, we had a hard frost last week and lost the tomato plants in spite of having them covered. I'm not sure, but one of my hardy fuchsias may have succumbed, as well. Today, Boyo offered to go to the nursery and get replacement tomatoes, so Dearest fixed him up with money, the plant markers (as we had four different varieties) and a way to carry the plants the half mile safely home. Girlie decided she wanted to go along, and took some of her own money to buy more pansies. It's a great feeling when the kids do something just a bit out of my comfort zone and we all celebrate their success!

A timely find!

I'm pretty excited about a book I recently found on the fundraiser cart at the learning center where Girlie takes her social skills classes. I knew from the first page that this book will be invaluable.

When the weather is mild I love to be outside, and lately I've had a few quiet opportunities to sit outside knitting and listening to audiobooks. I've wondered if there is a limit to what I'm willing to knit, but no - in fact - I haven't found it yet. To that end, I have to say that my mp3 player is an important part of my life, and I'm willing to put forth some effort into keeping it safe and the earbud cords untangled.

'Untangled' is a great free pattern available on Ravelry!

What's next? You just never know!

Nothing New Under the Sun?

Seriously, nothing noteworthy has happened in two weeks? No, in fact; plenty has happened: some was more of the same, but not all of it.

The adjustment period immediately after The Pup left was eased by the first guest-pup, and then a few days later, Girlie took charge of another guest-pup. I think after he leaves this evening, we'll take a break and give her time to really adjust without the distraction of another dog.

Recently we have had highs and lows with both kiddos: public recognition of a piece written for a state-wide competition and being chosen for a lead role in a fall production have been countered with the stress of end-of-year school testing, falling behind in homework, and new challenges in math. One of the signs of stress we see most often with Girlie is wakefulness in the evening, and we can hear her quietly puttering around in her room 'til long after she should be asleep. Boyo is the opposite: he can usually fall asleep just fine, but if he has something on his mind he'll be in the kitchen rummaging for breakfast an hour before it's time to get up.

Dearest and I find the best way to deal with stress, this time of year, is to get Girlie out in the garden and throw Boyo in the pool. Girlie wants to plant things - she doesn't even really care what she plants - and will pull up leftover or volunteer perrenials or tree seedlings and put them in pots all over the yard. Boyo needs something safe to keep him busy, and the more physical activity, the better. He wants to swim every chance he gets! Money talks with that boy, and he's pretty happy to be taking over Grandma's lawn chores this year.

Ready to plant (Girlie has some pansies this year)

Waiting to receive (see the pots of miscellany?)

The best part at this moment is not whether anything is new under the sun, but that there is sun. I think I'll take my coffee and knitting outside and see if that goldfinch comes by again this morning...

Sunny Days!

We managed to get away to Hansville for a couple days and it went pretty well. Boyo sometimes has a hard time with anxiety when we're this far out of our routine, which is reflected in his behavior, but it wasn't too bad. I finished the wool vest for Dearest after stopping at my favorite yarn shop to buy buttons, and treated myself to a skein of alpaca/silk blend yarn and a pattern to go with it.

The proprietor of my favorite yarn store really knows her buttons - these are perfect!

We had some sun, and Dearest and kiddos had plenty of beach time, which included finding several agates (Girlie found an unusually large one, which are rare)...

Girie found a large agate this time, and Boyo found two small 'red' agates

...and even the fossilized tooth of a woolly mammoth, as confirmed by the Burke Museum of Natural History and Culture!

A view of the chewing surface of the tooth

This image from Wikipedia compares the jaw of a mammoth and that of an Indian elephant. Hardly any change over thousands of years of evolution, so apparently the design works.

We also went to Port Gamble so the kids could see the shell museum, and of course we were able to do a lot of eagle watching on this trip, and even had a rare glimpse of a pod of harbor porpoise!

It's been a busy week, and we're finishing it up with a little more spring cleaning. Dearest is even washing the windows - let the sun shine in!

Floundering

flounder

verb

1. falter, struggle, stall, slow down, run into trouble, come unstuck (informal), be in difficulties, hit a bad patch 

Writing is not coming easily these days, because I'm feeling everything we're going through is just more of the same. Life in general is like that - we're just trying to be consistent in the way we're dealing with the current issues; some days it seems more of a grind, and I know that attitude comes across in my writing.

We're in the birthday season, which brings with it more adolescent behavior challenges, and we're approaching spring break. Next week we have half days, and both kids will need to be kept busy with something other than screen time. Dearest has vacation time during spring break and we have plans both for at home and a little trip!

Winter Flounder

If there is a question or topic I can address I'll be happy to do the research. I expect the next two weeks will provide something in the way of inspiration, as well. At the moment, the sun shining in the window over my shoulder is the best reason I can think of not to be writing - Happy Spring!  :-)

Working Through It

After days of math misery and a session of after-school help, we've made it through the latest rough patch. Boyo is doing all right for the moment, and so is Girlie. In fact, the midterm reports that came home the other day looked great!

We'll be in the midst of birthday season, shortly, and Dearest and I aren't sure where that will lead us. A time for fun and celebrating, right? So one might hope, but we never know - in fact, the expectations leading up to the day can result in a crash of epic proportions so we try to keep things as low-key as possible. 

It can be difficult to achieve a celebratory feel that is satisfying to a child when the usual birthday party agenda doesn't fit the family. Fortunately, spring break falls between their birthdays and we try to have some very special combined event - this year it may be a trip to the zoo and the beach, since Dearest will be on vacation for the whole week! :-)

I'll leave you with a cartoon that ticks all the boxes for me: knitting, math jokes, and clever word-play. Have a great weekend!

Frazz Comic Strip - 2/25/12

Busy, Busy, Busy!

This is a busy week for us, as Boyo is preparing for a ballet recital on Saturday - that means rehearsal every day except Wednesday.  Dearest changed schedules this week, so we're in adjustment mode for that, as well.

After last week, we had a talk with Girlie about our difficult mornings.  I have it on good authority we are not the only family that has trouble getting a kiddo on the spectrum moving in the morning, but we must have some improvement.  The rules we had established gradually fell by the wayside until Girlie would still be sitting at the breakfast table without socks on when the bus showed up, after spending much of the previous half hour in a nasty, vicious mood, then heading out to the bus crying because she'd been hurried.

Because of Dearest's schedule changing, he won't be rushing to get ready for work, so that should help keep the situation more calm in the morning.  We talked with Girlie about our expectations in the evening before bedtime, too.  I'm not holding my breath, but I am feeling optimistic.  Of course, I always do :-)

Boyo worked on math all weekend.  After missing out on a chance to stay after school to play floor hockey last week due to a failing grade in one class, and being told he will be staying after school for homework help in math this week, he's making an effort.  In exchanging a few emails with teachers, it seems Boyo is having trouble keeping things organized and turning in assignments in a few of his classes, and his grades are beginning to reflect the problem.  One thing in his favor is that the grades provide some motivation for him, unlike with Girlie, who either couldn't see the connection or couldn't be bothered to care.

So, we have some specific things to work on this week, places to go, people to see, the arts to appreciate.  I have a couple of requested items on the needles at the moment, one of which is a dog sweater.  Better get busy!*

Another great ecard from Lion Brand!

*Just so you know, I can never think of that phrase in the same way since I learned it is always the code phrase when training guide dog pups to relieve on command :-)

Win Some, Lose Some...

Between raising our own children, spending some time as a substitute educational assistant, and taking classes to learn about working with children who have ADHD/ADD, developmental disabilities, or extreme behavioral or other mental health issues, it seems like I'd be well prepared to tackle most any problem that arises, right?  Unfortunately, no - in fact, I'm constantly doing more research, reading books, consulting with other folks who might have had similar experiences, and talking things over with Dearest.  One thing is certain: all the intellectual knowledge in the world is no guarantee the problem will be solved in practice.

The first year of middle school can be challenging for any kid.  The first year of middle school for a child with learning and behavioral challenges can be really hard.  That means it isn't a cake walk for parents, either.  Currently, Boyo is struggling with keeping himself organized and turning in assignments.  Considering everything we've been going through with Girlie, one might imagine I have a lot of information and ideas about how to help him.  The problem is figuring out how to get him to accept help.

Boyo is having a hard time seeing the continuum of the problem as it goes from week to week.  Not only that, he adamantly refuses to accept any help because he feels he doesn't need it.  Using the 'checklist' conversation, he understands each concept individually: if there is a missing assignment he says he'll find it and turn it in; if he failed a spelling test he says he'll ask for a review/retake, etc.  He finally agreed to let us look over his math homework as he often has scores of 60% or below, but still argues about whether he has performed operations correctly, and won't get on the math website to check or practice. Because, according to him, he doesn't have a problem, and doesn't need help.

These examples are all part of oppositional defiance, and the reason why the coping and accommodation methods we've learned - that we know will work - aren't going to do any good for Boyo. An interesting twist to our situation is that Boyo has a fairly high anxiety component, and doesn't exhibit some of the usual ODD traits at school.  While most children perform better when they are relaxed, that's about the only time Boyo gets in trouble. Dearest and I keep practicing 'The 3 Rs", which in this house means reading, researching, and reviewing.  It never hurts to be reminded of a technique we may have forgotten, or be reassured we are doing all we can for that day, or that hour, or that moment.  We win some, we lose some, but we keep doing the best we can with what we know.

Part of most days I spend with a bunch of friends I've never met.  I'm in a Ravelry group of like-minded knitters who started out with a particular thing in common, which was a love for author Terry Pratchett.  Currently we are having "Guild Wars" - I'm in the Teacher's Guild :-) - and have submitted my first project for the 2012 competition.  How's this for winsome?

Milo loves his new hat!

Just Give it to Me Straight...

We don't have a diagnosis of obsessive/compulsive disorder in our family, but we do go through periods during which Boyo is completely hung up on an idea and can't seem to let it go.  We can have a discussion, itemizing reasons why what he wants is impractical and/or unreasonable, each of which he verbalizes understanding.  So the conversation is over, we think the subject is dropped, and everyone goes about his or her business.  For about five minutes.

Usually it isn't anything new, just a variation on a theme - video games are the most frequent topic.  It would be strange if Boyo asked for game time fewer than half a dozen times between coming home from school and bedtime.  This weekend, he definitely caught Dearest and I by surprise by being completely stuck on the idea of straightening his hair.

Does it bother us that he wants to do something like that?  No, in fact, we have no problem with the kids wanting to express their individuality through personal style. Boyo had his ears pierced when he was eight - we made him wait a whole year after he started asking, to make sure it wasn't a passing fancy - and wears a different style of earring in each ear.  He likes to have flashes of color in his hair - currently it's purple.  The only hard and fast, no-exceptions rule we have about clothing is that it has to fit properly and not show underclothes.

Carey, being the cool big sister that she is, took it in stride when her little brother came over to have his hair straightened and get styling tips.  Yes, she tells him the same things I do, but it gives me a break from the repetitive subject for a while.  Of course, since the subject came up, Girlie has to get in on this because she has much more experience, and even has her own hair straightener, which she graciously offered to let Boyo use.  The trouble is, hers is an old one that has large plates, and Boyo has pretty short hair.  He desperately needs to get one like Carey's...

Tune in next time - we'll see how long this phase lasts.  :-)

Basketweave stitch pattern in Paton's Kroy sock yarn 'Mulberry Stripes'

Sooner or later, most knitters will develop a preference for a particular brand or style of needle.  For many folks, the choice comes down to circular or straight needles.  I almost always use circular needles, even when I'm not knitting in the round, because circs are easier to use on the treadmill and I don't have to worry about dropping a needle.  I'll always have straight needles available, and I think they look great on display in a knitted pencil holder - a can with a sleeve knitted in any stitch pattern one cares to use.  The one shown here was knitted with left over sock yarn on my little 9" circular needles and was a great 'stashbuster' project.